I went back to the endocrinologist on Monday morning, quite smug. I was right (still doing my told ya so dance!), and ready to let him know my game plan (that I had been developing for months, and ready to implement as soon as he was willing to listen to me).
Unfortunately, he was equally as smug, and equally NOT willing to listen. I was dead set against using Synthroid, and really really wanted to be put on Armour
(Read about the differences here: http://www.ehow.com/facts_5097590_armour-thyroid-better-having-synthroid.html)
He was dead set on my using anything BUT Synthroid, and said that no doctor in the Greater KC Metro area would prescribe me Armour
(the condensed version of the argument is basically, they do not think it Armour is "pure enough". It is made from dessicated pig thyroid = all natural, and dosages can vary from bottle to bottle. As one doctor put it "one dead pig is different than another dead pig". Whereas Synthroid is a man-made chemical version of the thyroid hormone and therefore is an exact dosage every single time. However, Synthroid only takes care of the T4 hormone, where Armour takes care of T3 AND T4...and the basic reporting from thyroid patients is that when both hormones are taken care of they feel immensely better. So why wouldn't I want to take Armour again...?)
I knew there would be a fight trying to get Armour, and I obviously needed medication NOW, so I decided to take the Synthroid in the meantime, and then continue to search for a prescription for Armour on my own time.
I had a very frank discussion with Dr. Know-It-All, and was feeling a little better about him until he ended the appointment with the following:
"Erin, you'll live with this the rest of your life. Relax. At least you aren't a diabetic or something, because that is MUCH WORSE"
EXCUSE ME? How do you know? You just gave me a life sentence for a really, at times, debilitating auto-immune disease. I know its not cancer or MS or something, but don't downplay what I've been through! I fired him on the spot, took my prescription for Synthroid and left his office forever. I still had my appointment with my gynecologist in the same building, so I headed downstairs to talk to her. From that point on she agreed to take over my thyroid care until I was able to find another endocrinologist I worked better with. She also gave me the number to a Naturopath to talk about dietary concerns with auto-immune disease and some natural alternatives to wellness.
Then we had THE BIG TALK: Can I have a baby with all this business going on? Short answer, yes. Long answer, not without potential complications....
to be continued...
Put a Bubble in Your Mouth...
Saturday, July 2, 2011
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
The Mechanics
So I guess now that we've figure out WHAT it is I have, I should really start at the beginning - Hashimoto's attacks your thyroid, right? So what is your thyroid exactly?
from http://www.endocrineweb.com/conditions/thyroid/your-thyroid-gland:
How Your Thyroid Works
Your thyroid gland is a small gland, normally weighing less than one ounce, located in the front of the neck. It is made up of two halves, called lobes, that lie along the windpipe (trachea) and are joined together by a narrow band of thyroid tissue, known as the isthmus.
The thyroid is situated just below your "Adams apple" or larynx. During development (inside the womb) the thyroid gland originates in the back of the tongue, but it normally migrates to the front of the neck before birth. Sometimes it fails to migrate properly and is located high in the neck or even in the back of the tongue (lingual thyroid) This is very rare. At other times it may migrate too far and ends up in the chest (this is also rare).
The function of the thyroid gland is to take iodine, found in many foods, and convert it into thyroid hormones: thyroxine (T4) and triiodothyronine (T3). Thyroid cells are the only cells in the body which can absorb iodine. These cells combine iodine and the amino acid tyrosine to make T3 and T4. T3 and T4 are then released into the blood stream and are transported throughout the body where they control metabolism (conversion of oxygen and calories to energy). Every cell in the body depends upon thyroid hormones for regulation of their metabolism. The normal thyroid gland produces about 80% T4 and about 20% T3, however, T3 possesses about four times the hormone "strength" as T4.
The thyroid gland is under the control of the pituitary gland, a small gland the size of a peanut at the base of the brain (shown here in orange). When the level of thyroid hormones (T3 & T4) drops too low, the pituitary gland produces Thyroid Stimulating Hormone (TSH) which stimulates the thyroid gland to produce more hormones. Under the influence of TSH, the thyroid will manufacture and secrete T3 and T4 thereby raising their blood levels. The pituitary senses this and responds by decreasing its TSH production. One can imagine the thyroid gland as a furnace and the pituitary gland as the thermostat. Thyroid hormones are like heat. When the heat gets back to the thermostat, it turns the thermostat off. As the room cools (the thyroid hormone levels drop), the thermostat turns back on (TSH increases) and the furnace produces more heat (thyroid hormones).
The pituitary gland itself is regulated by another gland, known as the hypothalamus (shown in our picture in light blue). The hypothalamus is part of the brain and produces TSH Releasing Hormone (TRH) which tells the pituitary gland to stimulate the thyroid gland (release TSH). One might imagine the hypothalamus as the person who regulates the thermostat since it tells the pituitary gland at what level the thyroid should be set.
Hashimoto's thyroiditis is not only the most common form of thyroiditis (inflammation of the thyroid gland) but also the most common thyroid disorder in America. The disease, which is also known as chronic lymphocytic thyroiditis or autoimmune thyroiditis, affects 14 million people in the United States alone.1
Hashimoto's thyroiditis is named after the Japanese surgeon who discovered it in 1912. It is an autoimmune disorder, which means it occurs when immune cells attack healthy tissue instead of protecting it. In the case of Hashimoto's thyroiditis, immune cells mistakenly attack healthy thyroid tissue, causing inflammation of the thyroid. Autoimmune diseases affect women more than men, and women are 7 times more likely to have Hashimoto's thyroiditis.1.
When your thyroid gland comes under attack from malfunctioning immune cells, it impairs your thyroid's ability to make thyroid hormone. This can result in hypothyroidism. Hashimoto's thyroiditis is the most common cause of hypothyroidism.
If Hashimoto's thyroiditis attacks your thyroid to the point that the gland can no longer produce enough thyroid hormones for your body to function properly, then you will develop hypothyroidism.
But hypothyroidism isn't the only complication associated with Hashimoto's thyroiditis. In some people, the disorder causes the thyroid to become so inflamed and enlarged that a goiter develops.
For people who develop symptoms of Hashimoto's thyroiditis, such as hypothyroidism or goiter, thyroid hormone therapy is needed.
Hashimoto's thyroiditis, or inflammation of the thyroid gland, is an autoimmune disorder. That means it is caused by a malfunction in your immune system. Instead of protecting your thyroid tissue, your immune cells attack it. These immune cells can cause hypothyroidism (underactive thyroid), a goiter (enlarged thyroid), or both. Eventually, the thyroiditis process can even destroy your entire thyroid, if left undetected or untreated.
In Hashimoto's thyroiditis, large amounts of damaged immune cells invade the thyroid. These immune cells are called lymphocytes; this is where Hashimoto's other name—chronic lymphocytic thyroiditis—is derived from.
When these lymphocytes enter the thyroid, they destroy the cells, tissue, and blood vessels within the gland. The process of destroying the thyroid gland is a slow one, which is why many people who have Hashimoto's thyroiditis go many years without any noticeable symptoms. You can read more about this in our article about the symptoms of Hashimoto's thyroiditis.
Because the thyroid is essentially coming under attack from invading cells, it isn't able to produce as much thyroid hormone as it normally would. Eventually, this causes hypothyroidism. And in extreme cases, the immune cells can cause the thyroid to become enlarged and inflamed to the point that it produces a visible mass in the neck—a goiter.
Doctors aren't entirely sure why the immune system, which is supposed to defend the body from harmful viruses and bacteria, sometimes turns against the body's healthy tissues. But what scientists do understand is that there are some factors that may make you more susceptible to this disease.
There are various treatments available, but the basic concept is the same—and it's known as thyroid hormone replacement therapy.
To best understand the purpose of thyroid hormone replacement therapy, you need to understand the interaction of T3 and T4—the two thyroid hormones.
T3 and T4
The full name of T3 is triiodothyronine, and T4's full name is tetraiodothyronine or thyroxine. T3 and T4 control your body's metabolism. If you don't have enough of them, then your metabolism slows down. Your metabolic rate dictates how quickly you process food, how fast your heart beats, how much heat your body creates—and even how quickly you can think. In essence, T3 and T4 are in charge of how your body uses energy.
T3 and T4 are not equal in strength; T3 is the more active hormone of the two. While T3 is stronger, taking synthetic T4 hormone is considered the standard treatment for hypothyroidism. The reason for this is because most of the T3 in our bodies actually used to be T4. When T4 hormones come into contact with other cells in the bloodstream, they give up an iodine atom to interact with those cells. When T4 loses an iodine atom, it becomes T3.
When this T4 into T3 conversion occurs, T3 then conveys the metabolic "message" to the other cells throughout the body. The benefit of taking only T4 therapy is that you're allowing your body to perform some of the actions it is meant to do, which is taking T4 and changing it into T3. The half life of T4 is also longer compared to T3 (7 days versus 24 hours), that means that it will stay for a longer time in your body after ingestion.
Confused yet? Yeah, me too...let's just put it this way - it common, its treatable. I ain't dying! (even though some days it feels like it!)
from http://www.endocrineweb.com/conditions/thyroid/your-thyroid-gland:
How Your Thyroid Works
"A delicate Feedback Mechanism"
Your thyroid gland is a small gland, normally weighing less than one ounce, located in the front of the neck. It is made up of two halves, called lobes, that lie along the windpipe (trachea) and are joined together by a narrow band of thyroid tissue, known as the isthmus.The function of the thyroid gland is to take iodine, found in many foods, and convert it into thyroid hormones: thyroxine (T4) and triiodothyronine (T3). Thyroid cells are the only cells in the body which can absorb iodine. These cells combine iodine and the amino acid tyrosine to make T3 and T4. T3 and T4 are then released into the blood stream and are transported throughout the body where they control metabolism (conversion of oxygen and calories to energy). Every cell in the body depends upon thyroid hormones for regulation of their metabolism. The normal thyroid gland produces about 80% T4 and about 20% T3, however, T3 possesses about four times the hormone "strength" as T4.
The thyroid gland is under the control of the pituitary gland, a small gland the size of a peanut at the base of the brain (shown here in orange). When the level of thyroid hormones (T3 & T4) drops too low, the pituitary gland produces Thyroid Stimulating Hormone (TSH) which stimulates the thyroid gland to produce more hormones. Under the influence of TSH, the thyroid will manufacture and secrete T3 and T4 thereby raising their blood levels. The pituitary senses this and responds by decreasing its TSH production. One can imagine the thyroid gland as a furnace and the pituitary gland as the thermostat. Thyroid hormones are like heat. When the heat gets back to the thermostat, it turns the thermostat off. As the room cools (the thyroid hormone levels drop), the thermostat turns back on (TSH increases) and the furnace produces more heat (thyroid hormones).The pituitary gland itself is regulated by another gland, known as the hypothalamus (shown in our picture in light blue). The hypothalamus is part of the brain and produces TSH Releasing Hormone (TRH) which tells the pituitary gland to stimulate the thyroid gland (release TSH). One might imagine the hypothalamus as the person who regulates the thermostat since it tells the pituitary gland at what level the thyroid should be set.
Hashimoto's thyroiditis is not only the most common form of thyroiditis (inflammation of the thyroid gland) but also the most common thyroid disorder in America. The disease, which is also known as chronic lymphocytic thyroiditis or autoimmune thyroiditis, affects 14 million people in the United States alone.1
Hashimoto's thyroiditis is named after the Japanese surgeon who discovered it in 1912. It is an autoimmune disorder, which means it occurs when immune cells attack healthy tissue instead of protecting it. In the case of Hashimoto's thyroiditis, immune cells mistakenly attack healthy thyroid tissue, causing inflammation of the thyroid. Autoimmune diseases affect women more than men, and women are 7 times more likely to have Hashimoto's thyroiditis.1.
When your thyroid gland comes under attack from malfunctioning immune cells, it impairs your thyroid's ability to make thyroid hormone. This can result in hypothyroidism. Hashimoto's thyroiditis is the most common cause of hypothyroidism.
If Hashimoto's thyroiditis attacks your thyroid to the point that the gland can no longer produce enough thyroid hormones for your body to function properly, then you will develop hypothyroidism.
But hypothyroidism isn't the only complication associated with Hashimoto's thyroiditis. In some people, the disorder causes the thyroid to become so inflamed and enlarged that a goiter develops.
For people who develop symptoms of Hashimoto's thyroiditis, such as hypothyroidism or goiter, thyroid hormone therapy is needed.
Hashimoto's thyroiditis, or inflammation of the thyroid gland, is an autoimmune disorder. That means it is caused by a malfunction in your immune system. Instead of protecting your thyroid tissue, your immune cells attack it. These immune cells can cause hypothyroidism (underactive thyroid), a goiter (enlarged thyroid), or both. Eventually, the thyroiditis process can even destroy your entire thyroid, if left undetected or untreated.
In Hashimoto's thyroiditis, large amounts of damaged immune cells invade the thyroid. These immune cells are called lymphocytes; this is where Hashimoto's other name—chronic lymphocytic thyroiditis—is derived from.
When these lymphocytes enter the thyroid, they destroy the cells, tissue, and blood vessels within the gland. The process of destroying the thyroid gland is a slow one, which is why many people who have Hashimoto's thyroiditis go many years without any noticeable symptoms. You can read more about this in our article about the symptoms of Hashimoto's thyroiditis.
Because the thyroid is essentially coming under attack from invading cells, it isn't able to produce as much thyroid hormone as it normally would. Eventually, this causes hypothyroidism. And in extreme cases, the immune cells can cause the thyroid to become enlarged and inflamed to the point that it produces a visible mass in the neck—a goiter.
Doctors aren't entirely sure why the immune system, which is supposed to defend the body from harmful viruses and bacteria, sometimes turns against the body's healthy tissues. But what scientists do understand is that there are some factors that may make you more susceptible to this disease.
There are various treatments available, but the basic concept is the same—and it's known as thyroid hormone replacement therapy.
To best understand the purpose of thyroid hormone replacement therapy, you need to understand the interaction of T3 and T4—the two thyroid hormones.
T3 and T4
The full name of T3 is triiodothyronine, and T4's full name is tetraiodothyronine or thyroxine. T3 and T4 control your body's metabolism. If you don't have enough of them, then your metabolism slows down. Your metabolic rate dictates how quickly you process food, how fast your heart beats, how much heat your body creates—and even how quickly you can think. In essence, T3 and T4 are in charge of how your body uses energy.
T3 and T4 are not equal in strength; T3 is the more active hormone of the two. While T3 is stronger, taking synthetic T4 hormone is considered the standard treatment for hypothyroidism. The reason for this is because most of the T3 in our bodies actually used to be T4. When T4 hormones come into contact with other cells in the bloodstream, they give up an iodine atom to interact with those cells. When T4 loses an iodine atom, it becomes T3.
When this T4 into T3 conversion occurs, T3 then conveys the metabolic "message" to the other cells throughout the body. The benefit of taking only T4 therapy is that you're allowing your body to perform some of the actions it is meant to do, which is taking T4 and changing it into T3. The half life of T4 is also longer compared to T3 (7 days versus 24 hours), that means that it will stay for a longer time in your body after ingestion.
Confused yet? Yeah, me too...let's just put it this way - it common, its treatable. I ain't dying! (even though some days it feels like it!)
Monday, June 27, 2011
I TOLD YOU SO!
By December 2010, I still had no solid diagnosis, but I was seeing Dr. Michelle on a weekly basis, and had been doing a lot of my own research and coming up with some ideas of my own. I was really paying attention to certain food triggers - things like salmon, red wine, salt, cheese, etc really caused my feet and hands to swell to ridiculous proportions. Keeping away from those foods helped a little, but I was still waking up every morning with stiff, red, swollen hands and fingers. I was so stiff and tired in the mornings, no matter how much I slept, I never felt refreshed. Many days I just had to power through the blinding fatigue, and Thank God for my amazing husband who did more than his fair share of chores and errands as I took multiple, daily cat naps. Thank God for him also putting up with my cranky demeanor and general pissed off attitude. Being in pain 90% of the time takes its toll on a person very quickly. I started swimming twice a week, and the cool water was very soothing on my sore, inflamed joints, and it was a great cardio and strength workout to boot! I think it was the best I'd felt in months, during my swimming classes.
By this time my periods were anywhere from 45-55 days apart and I was starting to get very frustrated and discouraged that my body was just not cool with me ever housing another baby. And by this point too, I was feeling so blah, that I wasn't sure anymore that I even WANTED to be pregnant again. Uh Oh. Here we go again...Erin was hopping back on the emotional roller coaster of wishy washyness.
Then...the day of reckoning...December 17th, 2010. (insert Doomsday music here - DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN)
I had a 6 month follow up with my first endocrinologist in order to re-scan my thyroid and redo blood work. I walked in, literally, with a bag full of articles, print outs, books, any information I could get my hands on to convince this guy that I had a thyroid condition. He walked in with the most disgusting smug look that I have ever seen on anyone's face. He looked at my stack of info, rolled his eyes and said "Stay off the internet Erin. It's all misinformation, nothing is wrong with you"...
At this point I was fighting back tears, and I started to question him on why then, reputable sources were stating the contrary. He looked at me and said "I ethically cannot diagnose you with anything when your lab work is within normal range"...
but this is EXACTLY what all the sources are saying!!!!!!!
from the website - http://thyroid.about.com/od/gettestedanddiagnosed/a/diagnosis.htm
"To diagnose or rule out hypothyroidism, doctors will typically start with the blood test that measures thyroid-stimulating hormone (TSH). As of Spring 2003, most American laboratories had a normal range from around 0.5 to 5.5. However, the American Association of Clinical Endocrinologists has recently recommended that the normal range be revised to 0.3 to 3.0. With 5.5 as the top end of the normal range, a TSH above that level is considered hypothyroid. Under the newer guidelines, however, a TSH above 3.0 could be diagnosed as hypothyroid"
My TSH was at a 5 at my appointment 6 months ago!!! I was .5 away from being Hypothyroid, and I was highly symptomatic, but yet they wouldn't diagnose me, wouldn't give me the needed medication to make me feel better!!!!
I started to ask him more questions, and he said "Maybe this is all in your head. I could prescribe an antidepressant".....WTF?!!!! at this point, I was either going to cry or punch him in the face. I said, quite curtly, NO THANK YOU. And he says, "Then I can no longer help you, you'll need to find a new doctor". SERIOUSLY?!
I held it together long enough to walk out of the hospital. I'm pretty sure that anyone who saw me walking to the parking garage thought I was either just diagnosed with cancer, or someone very close to me just died. I was doing the ugly cry walk of shame all the way out the hospital doors. I. WAS. SO. ANGRY. There was no other word to describe it. I went into my car and screamed as loud as I could. Totally disrespected by a medical "professional". Again. Sobbing, screaming, punching the steering wheel. I felt alone. So very utterly alone.
Ok, get it together Creeden. I was hosting a little Pre-Christmas, pajama/karaoke party for some of my favorite work girls later that evening. I still had to go to the grocery store and get the house ready. I was in the middle of vacuuming the living room when I got the phone call that forever changed my life. It was the nurse from the endocrinologist's office...
"Mrs. Creeden, I just wanted to check up on you. The doctor knew you were very upset when you left"....well, yeah, what was your first clue, moron.
"Well, I also just wanted to let you know that we processed your lab results quicker than normal, and I need to tell you that they came back that you have Hashimoto's Thyroid Disease"
WHAT THE FUCK?! I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO!!!!!! (this is the part where I was doing my happy dance jig in the kitchen)
"Mrs. Creeden, I also need you to know that you need to take a pregnancy test tonight. And if you aren't pregnant, you need to immediately get on the pill because it could be very detrimental to your baby if you did get pregnant"
WAIT. WHAT. THE. FUCK? I've been trying to get pregnant since May!!!!!! You've told me this WHOLE TIME that I was HEALTHY! That nothing was wrong...and now you're telling me I have a full blown disease that could be harmful to my baby?!?!?! What if I already was pregnant?! What if you and your stupid .5 on a blood test would've caused my baby to have major birth defects?!???!
(this is the part where I was stopped dead in my tracks and collapsed on the kitchen floor into a puddle of worn out emotional goo)
"Mrs. Creeden, the Doctor is going to call in a prescription for Synthroid. You need to go to the pharmacy RIGHT NOW and pick it up and start taking it tonight. Your condition is advanced, and you need medication immediately"
EXCUSE ME? No, I don't think so. I'm not going to pop a pill just because you suddenly tell me its ok. I'm informed, remember? I know better than this...I want to talk to the doctor again, I want to know my options. The nurse decided that I would be ok unmedicated until Monday, so I scheduled another appointment with him first thing in the morning. I also made an appointment with my gynocologist the same day, so I could get her opinion on being pregnant with this disease.
Can I just say THANK GOD FOR GOOD GIRLFRIENDS! I don't think I would've gotten through that evening or weekend without them. They offered to not come over that night, we could just cancel the party, but no, I needed it more than anything. They held my hand, drank tequila with me, listened to me cry, sang their lungs out to basement karaoke with me, and helped me forget the day I had just had.
Everything is going to be ok...
To Be Continued...
but first - for the mechanics of Hashimoto's Disease - from the website: http://www.stopthethyroidmadness.com/hashimotos/ and http://thyroid.about.com/cs/hypothyroidism/a/hashivshypo.htm
Hashimoto's disease is a disease, and hypothyroidism is a condition. Hypothyroidism is most commonly caused by Hashimoto's disease, but the two terms are not interchangeable. Here is more information to help understand the difference.
WHAT IS HASHIMOTOS? Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis is an autoimmune thyroid disease in which your thyroid is being attacked by your own immune system via antibodies, attempting to destroy your gland as if it’s some vile enemy. It may start out silently, but the attack will eventually cause an inflammation and gradual destruction of your thyroid gland and can go on for years with miserable side effects to match. It can also cause nodules or lumps. It may be the most common thyroid disease, especially with women.
HASHIMOTO'S DISEASE
Hashimoto's disease, sometimes known as Hashimoto's thyroiditis, autoimmune thyroiditis, or chronic lymphocytic thyroiditis, is an autoimmune disease. In Hashimoto's, antibodies react against proteins in the thyroid gland, causing gradual destruction of the gland itself, and making the gland unable to produce the thyroid hormones the body needs.
What is an autoimmune disease?An autoimmune disease occurs when the body's immune system becomes misdirected and attacks the organs, cells or tissues that it was designed to protect. About 75% of autoimmune diseases occur in women, most frequently during their childbearing years.
FUN TIMES FRIENDS....fun. times.
Here's some pics from the karaoke/PJ party...I love you girls!
By this time my periods were anywhere from 45-55 days apart and I was starting to get very frustrated and discouraged that my body was just not cool with me ever housing another baby. And by this point too, I was feeling so blah, that I wasn't sure anymore that I even WANTED to be pregnant again. Uh Oh. Here we go again...Erin was hopping back on the emotional roller coaster of wishy washyness.
Then...the day of reckoning...December 17th, 2010. (insert Doomsday music here - DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN)
I had a 6 month follow up with my first endocrinologist in order to re-scan my thyroid and redo blood work. I walked in, literally, with a bag full of articles, print outs, books, any information I could get my hands on to convince this guy that I had a thyroid condition. He walked in with the most disgusting smug look that I have ever seen on anyone's face. He looked at my stack of info, rolled his eyes and said "Stay off the internet Erin. It's all misinformation, nothing is wrong with you"...
At this point I was fighting back tears, and I started to question him on why then, reputable sources were stating the contrary. He looked at me and said "I ethically cannot diagnose you with anything when your lab work is within normal range"...
but this is EXACTLY what all the sources are saying!!!!!!!
from the website - http://thyroid.about.com/od/gettestedanddiagnosed/a/diagnosis.htm
"To diagnose or rule out hypothyroidism, doctors will typically start with the blood test that measures thyroid-stimulating hormone (TSH). As of Spring 2003, most American laboratories had a normal range from around 0.5 to 5.5. However, the American Association of Clinical Endocrinologists has recently recommended that the normal range be revised to 0.3 to 3.0. With 5.5 as the top end of the normal range, a TSH above that level is considered hypothyroid. Under the newer guidelines, however, a TSH above 3.0 could be diagnosed as hypothyroid"
My TSH was at a 5 at my appointment 6 months ago!!! I was .5 away from being Hypothyroid, and I was highly symptomatic, but yet they wouldn't diagnose me, wouldn't give me the needed medication to make me feel better!!!!
I started to ask him more questions, and he said "Maybe this is all in your head. I could prescribe an antidepressant".....WTF?!!!! at this point, I was either going to cry or punch him in the face. I said, quite curtly, NO THANK YOU. And he says, "Then I can no longer help you, you'll need to find a new doctor". SERIOUSLY?!
I held it together long enough to walk out of the hospital. I'm pretty sure that anyone who saw me walking to the parking garage thought I was either just diagnosed with cancer, or someone very close to me just died. I was doing the ugly cry walk of shame all the way out the hospital doors. I. WAS. SO. ANGRY. There was no other word to describe it. I went into my car and screamed as loud as I could. Totally disrespected by a medical "professional". Again. Sobbing, screaming, punching the steering wheel. I felt alone. So very utterly alone.
Ok, get it together Creeden. I was hosting a little Pre-Christmas, pajama/karaoke party for some of my favorite work girls later that evening. I still had to go to the grocery store and get the house ready. I was in the middle of vacuuming the living room when I got the phone call that forever changed my life. It was the nurse from the endocrinologist's office...
"Mrs. Creeden, I just wanted to check up on you. The doctor knew you were very upset when you left"....well, yeah, what was your first clue, moron.
"Well, I also just wanted to let you know that we processed your lab results quicker than normal, and I need to tell you that they came back that you have Hashimoto's Thyroid Disease"
WHAT THE FUCK?! I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO!!!!!! (this is the part where I was doing my happy dance jig in the kitchen)
"Mrs. Creeden, I also need you to know that you need to take a pregnancy test tonight. And if you aren't pregnant, you need to immediately get on the pill because it could be very detrimental to your baby if you did get pregnant"
WAIT. WHAT. THE. FUCK? I've been trying to get pregnant since May!!!!!! You've told me this WHOLE TIME that I was HEALTHY! That nothing was wrong...and now you're telling me I have a full blown disease that could be harmful to my baby?!?!?! What if I already was pregnant?! What if you and your stupid .5 on a blood test would've caused my baby to have major birth defects?!???!
(this is the part where I was stopped dead in my tracks and collapsed on the kitchen floor into a puddle of worn out emotional goo)
"Mrs. Creeden, the Doctor is going to call in a prescription for Synthroid. You need to go to the pharmacy RIGHT NOW and pick it up and start taking it tonight. Your condition is advanced, and you need medication immediately"
EXCUSE ME? No, I don't think so. I'm not going to pop a pill just because you suddenly tell me its ok. I'm informed, remember? I know better than this...I want to talk to the doctor again, I want to know my options. The nurse decided that I would be ok unmedicated until Monday, so I scheduled another appointment with him first thing in the morning. I also made an appointment with my gynocologist the same day, so I could get her opinion on being pregnant with this disease.
Can I just say THANK GOD FOR GOOD GIRLFRIENDS! I don't think I would've gotten through that evening or weekend without them. They offered to not come over that night, we could just cancel the party, but no, I needed it more than anything. They held my hand, drank tequila with me, listened to me cry, sang their lungs out to basement karaoke with me, and helped me forget the day I had just had.
Everything is going to be ok...
To Be Continued...
but first - for the mechanics of Hashimoto's Disease - from the website: http://www.stopthethyroidmadness.com/hashimotos/ and http://thyroid.about.com/cs/hypothyroidism/a/hashivshypo.htm
Hashimoto's disease is a disease, and hypothyroidism is a condition. Hypothyroidism is most commonly caused by Hashimoto's disease, but the two terms are not interchangeable. Here is more information to help understand the difference.
WHAT IS HASHIMOTOS? Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis is an autoimmune thyroid disease in which your thyroid is being attacked by your own immune system via antibodies, attempting to destroy your gland as if it’s some vile enemy. It may start out silently, but the attack will eventually cause an inflammation and gradual destruction of your thyroid gland and can go on for years with miserable side effects to match. It can also cause nodules or lumps. It may be the most common thyroid disease, especially with women.
HASHIMOTO'S DISEASE
Hashimoto's disease, sometimes known as Hashimoto's thyroiditis, autoimmune thyroiditis, or chronic lymphocytic thyroiditis, is an autoimmune disease. In Hashimoto's, antibodies react against proteins in the thyroid gland, causing gradual destruction of the gland itself, and making the gland unable to produce the thyroid hormones the body needs.
What is an autoimmune disease?An autoimmune disease occurs when the body's immune system becomes misdirected and attacks the organs, cells or tissues that it was designed to protect. About 75% of autoimmune diseases occur in women, most frequently during their childbearing years.
FUN TIMES FRIENDS....fun. times.
Here's some pics from the karaoke/PJ party...I love you girls!
Sunday, June 26, 2011
It's all starting to make sense...
So I knew I loved Dr. Michelle the second I met her. I sat down and gave her my life story and she said, verbatim, "You're all sorts of fucked up". Love at first sight!!! This is my kind of girl! (her favorite term of endearment for me is also "Hey Freak"...If that's not love, I don't know what is, ha!)
Not only is she passionate about her work, she is equally commpassionate with her patients. She does not sugar coat the world for you, and let's you know there are expectations to your own healing. Probably the biggest thing I've learned from her is that there isn't a pill for everything, so quit expecting a doctor to make YOU feel better. Sometimes, you're better off if you really look within yourself and make the changes needed to get the life you want.
I know a lot of people think Chiropratic is some sort of quackery - but, I'm sorry, when I continuously feel better under her care, I am a true believer. You know me too, I'm an inherent skeptic about *most* things. I think at this point in my journey, however, I was an open book to anything that came my way. So many other "conventional" medical opinions weren't helping me. It was time to search other options. (It also helped that my gynocologist, an MD, who I've known and trusted for 10 years recommended going to a chiropractor for help)
from the website: http://www.spineguys.com/why_chiropractic/myths.asp
here are some fun facts:
emphasis on patient recuperative abilities rather than surgery
recognition that dynamics exist between lifestyle, environment and health
understanding the cause of illness in order to eliminate it, rather than simply treat symptoms
recognition of the centrality of the nervous system and its intimate relationship with the capacities of the human body
balancing benefits versus risks of clinical interventions
recognition of the primary importance of monitoring progress closely through appropriate diagnostic procedures
a patient-centered, hands-on approach focused on influencing function through structure
focus on early intervention emphasizing timely diagnosis and treatment of conditions that are wholly functional and reversible
So, if you also know me - I'm a "TAKE CHARGE" personality. OK! I CAN DO THIS! I'M TAKING CONTROL NOW. NO MORE SELF PITY AND BLAME. From here on out I was determined to research the hell out of what could potentially be causing all of my symptoms, what could be causing me to not be able to get pregnant. The next doctor I went to, I was not going to just buy what they were selling at face value. I was going to challenge the doctors and question EVERYTHING. Its MY body, its up to ME to heal it. "Understanding the cause of illness in order to eliminate it, rather than simply treat symptoms"....yeah, I like that!
Two specific instances that maybe will help make you a believer in the Chiropractic field too:
(Here comes the part for more TMI - another warning)
One of my major symptoms is extreme, chronic constipation. For the past two years, I will only "go' about once every 7-10 days. It's extremely uncomfortable and painful, and no amount of Mylanta, laxative, prune juice, or coffee will help. I can literally gain 3-7 pounds each week, just depending on how things are "flowing". Dr. Michelle does a quick massage on the colon pressure point on the webbed part of my hand (between the thumb and index finger), it hurts like hell, but by the time I am home my body is ready to relieve itself of all the toxins that have been building up. It is truly amazing how quickly the massage and acupressure work on stimulating my body into working normally.
The other thing that amazed me is that one day when Dr. Michelle was working on me, she asked me if I was feeling like I was coming down with a cold or sinus infection. I hadn't said anything to her about it! But all day long I had felt achy, and feverish, plugged up head, sore throat etc - exactly like the beginnings of a head cold. How did she know? She said my back felt blocked. I don't really know what that means, but she massaged my neck, face, back, and head at certain pressure points with some clove oil. I went home, did the neti pot (oooh I could write a whole post about the wonder of the neti pot), went to bed, and the next day felt awesome!
Okiedoke, I'm convinced. Like I said, I just feel better after a visit with her. Maybe its also because she kicks my ass on a weekly basis, and I guess I need that...
to be continued...
Not only is she passionate about her work, she is equally commpassionate with her patients. She does not sugar coat the world for you, and let's you know there are expectations to your own healing. Probably the biggest thing I've learned from her is that there isn't a pill for everything, so quit expecting a doctor to make YOU feel better. Sometimes, you're better off if you really look within yourself and make the changes needed to get the life you want.
I know a lot of people think Chiropratic is some sort of quackery - but, I'm sorry, when I continuously feel better under her care, I am a true believer. You know me too, I'm an inherent skeptic about *most* things. I think at this point in my journey, however, I was an open book to anything that came my way. So many other "conventional" medical opinions weren't helping me. It was time to search other options. (It also helped that my gynocologist, an MD, who I've known and trusted for 10 years recommended going to a chiropractor for help)
from the website: http://www.spineguys.com/why_chiropractic/myths.asp
here are some fun facts:
The Chiropractic Philosophy
The chiropractic perspective on health and disease emphasizes two fundamental concepts:
- the structure and condition of the body influences how the body functions and its ability to heal itself; and
- the mind-body relationship is instrumental in maintaining health and in the healing processes.
Although chiropractic shares much with other health professions, its emphasis and application of philosophy distinguishes it from modern medicine. Chiropractic philosophy gravitates toward a holistic ("total person") approach to healing which combines elements of the mind, body and spirit and maintains that health depends on obedience to natural laws, and that deviation from such laws can result in illness.
Chiropractic Philosophy includes:
So, if you also know me - I'm a "TAKE CHARGE" personality. OK! I CAN DO THIS! I'M TAKING CONTROL NOW. NO MORE SELF PITY AND BLAME. From here on out I was determined to research the hell out of what could potentially be causing all of my symptoms, what could be causing me to not be able to get pregnant. The next doctor I went to, I was not going to just buy what they were selling at face value. I was going to challenge the doctors and question EVERYTHING. Its MY body, its up to ME to heal it. "Understanding the cause of illness in order to eliminate it, rather than simply treat symptoms"....yeah, I like that!
Two specific instances that maybe will help make you a believer in the Chiropractic field too:
(Here comes the part for more TMI - another warning)
One of my major symptoms is extreme, chronic constipation. For the past two years, I will only "go' about once every 7-10 days. It's extremely uncomfortable and painful, and no amount of Mylanta, laxative, prune juice, or coffee will help. I can literally gain 3-7 pounds each week, just depending on how things are "flowing". Dr. Michelle does a quick massage on the colon pressure point on the webbed part of my hand (between the thumb and index finger), it hurts like hell, but by the time I am home my body is ready to relieve itself of all the toxins that have been building up. It is truly amazing how quickly the massage and acupressure work on stimulating my body into working normally.
The other thing that amazed me is that one day when Dr. Michelle was working on me, she asked me if I was feeling like I was coming down with a cold or sinus infection. I hadn't said anything to her about it! But all day long I had felt achy, and feverish, plugged up head, sore throat etc - exactly like the beginnings of a head cold. How did she know? She said my back felt blocked. I don't really know what that means, but she massaged my neck, face, back, and head at certain pressure points with some clove oil. I went home, did the neti pot (oooh I could write a whole post about the wonder of the neti pot), went to bed, and the next day felt awesome!
Okiedoke, I'm convinced. Like I said, I just feel better after a visit with her. Maybe its also because she kicks my ass on a weekly basis, and I guess I need that...
to be continued...
Decisions, Decisions
TMI ALERT! if you don't want to hear about my lady business....do not continue to read! You've been forewarned..
So in May 2010, I got of the pill in attempts to have another baby. Those of you who really know me and the muddled mess that is my brain, know that even getting to the point of deciding to have another child was a feat in and of itself. I am pretty happy with the ONE, amazing daughter we already have. I didn't necessarily have a "hard" pregnancy, but it wasn't necessarily the most fun I've ever had either. Sure, it was fascinating and all, I mean I'm GROWING A PERSON! all the little biological fun facts that go along with the process were pretty astounding. However, towards the end of my pregnancy I got the worst bout of femoral nerve siatica that anyone has ever experienced (well...maybe these freaks who carry 8 babies at a time feel worse, but that's kind of their own fault...in my honest opinion). The excruciating pain that radiated down my right leg was unbearable (can I just tell you too, that sometimes if I do a hard workout, or jog I still have numbness down that leg...just sayin') I couldn't stand for more than 10 minutes, and forget trying to walk across a parking lot or through a grocery store. I learned how to use those automated scooters pretty well! I used to fight the old people and fatties in the stores for them and to this day I am haunted by the sounds of "beep beep beep" as a Jazzy is backing up...this is also how I learned that for $20 you can order your entire grocery list online and Hyvee will deliver it to your front door. Dear Hyvee, you REALLY ARE "a helpful smile in every aisle"...
Now, I have two friends, specifically, whose road to having their babies was so scary that mine doesn't even compare..but mine is enough for this wimp to be a little hesitant for round 2!
Jillian was a week late and I had to be induced. Pitocin is liquid evil. After 14 hours of labor, 3 epidurals that stopped working, 3 hours of pushing with no drugs, and 4 layers of episiotomy stitches (no, not 4 stitches, FOUR LAYERS)...she was FINALLY HERE. It was not a pleasant experience at all. They basically ripped my baby from my body. Then the poor babe was in the NICU for an additional 3 days because she was so jaundiced. Three weeks after she was born we spent a week at Children's Mercy Hospital due to the fact that her ureters (tubes from the kidneys to the bladder) were underdeveloped. She spiked a 105 degree fever from a bladder/kidney infection, and had to have an IV through the top of her HEAD because they couldn't find a vein in her arm. Oh yeah, they also gave her a SPINAL TAP to make sure she didn't have meningitis...they made me leave the room for that procedure, and me in all of my postpartum glory had a full-on mega meltdown. Granted, she's almost 4 now and no worse for the wear - her kidneys developed without a transplant or surgery of any kind, which they were concerned about at first - but let's just say my first birth/newborn experience was not magical, it quite frankly, sucked ass. Ryan and I also discovered, we are not awesome people with zero sleep. We hated each other, and borderline hated our child (well, not really...but it was ROUGH). So despite it being almost 4 years later....this is all still very fresh in my mind. Wow. Do I really WANT to do all that drama again? and do it all again with a preschooler and a full time job in tow as well? (I wasn't working when I had Jillian) Let's think about this for a minute...
And when I say "think about it for a minute" I mean I AGONIZED for months. I made literal Pros and Cons lists. I talked anyones ear off who would sit and listen to me cry about all of my fears and reservations. I'm pretty sure people dodged spending time with me because it would just turn into another of "Erin's Existential Meltdowns".
So finally, FINALLY I felt good enough to say outloud "YES, I WANT ANOTHER BABY!" Yesssss! That wasn't so hard! LET'S DO THIS!
Now, with Jillian, I had been on the pill for eons. I was off of it for a grand total of 6 weeks and got pregnant on the first try. I assumed it would be even easier the second time around. Then, May turned to June, July, August, September......waaaaaaiiiiit a minute?! Why am I not pregnant?! I peed on the ovulation predictor sticks for months and well, isn't that interesting? I'M NOT EVEN OVULATING! WTF? I went to my gynocologist and she offered to give me Clomid - which is basically a fertility drug that forces you to ovulate. Downside is that you have a greater risk for multiples, and it makes you a little hormonally crazy while you're taking it. So much so, she requires your husband to come in before you start it for a "counseling session" regarding side effects. NO THANK YOU! There is enough crazy in our house as it is, so I declined the offer. she sent me to a chiropractor who has had success with other infertility patients (More on my beloved Dr. Michelle later...) This is why I absolutely love my gynocologist - she's into holistic and natural healing as well as chemical remedies.
This my friends started my quest on finding a path to WELLNESS.
THIS IS BIG TIME STUFF!
to be continued...
So in May 2010, I got of the pill in attempts to have another baby. Those of you who really know me and the muddled mess that is my brain, know that even getting to the point of deciding to have another child was a feat in and of itself. I am pretty happy with the ONE, amazing daughter we already have. I didn't necessarily have a "hard" pregnancy, but it wasn't necessarily the most fun I've ever had either. Sure, it was fascinating and all, I mean I'm GROWING A PERSON! all the little biological fun facts that go along with the process were pretty astounding. However, towards the end of my pregnancy I got the worst bout of femoral nerve siatica that anyone has ever experienced (well...maybe these freaks who carry 8 babies at a time feel worse, but that's kind of their own fault...in my honest opinion). The excruciating pain that radiated down my right leg was unbearable (can I just tell you too, that sometimes if I do a hard workout, or jog I still have numbness down that leg...just sayin') I couldn't stand for more than 10 minutes, and forget trying to walk across a parking lot or through a grocery store. I learned how to use those automated scooters pretty well! I used to fight the old people and fatties in the stores for them and to this day I am haunted by the sounds of "beep beep beep" as a Jazzy is backing up...this is also how I learned that for $20 you can order your entire grocery list online and Hyvee will deliver it to your front door. Dear Hyvee, you REALLY ARE "a helpful smile in every aisle"...
Now, I have two friends, specifically, whose road to having their babies was so scary that mine doesn't even compare..but mine is enough for this wimp to be a little hesitant for round 2!
Jillian was a week late and I had to be induced. Pitocin is liquid evil. After 14 hours of labor, 3 epidurals that stopped working, 3 hours of pushing with no drugs, and 4 layers of episiotomy stitches (no, not 4 stitches, FOUR LAYERS)...she was FINALLY HERE. It was not a pleasant experience at all. They basically ripped my baby from my body. Then the poor babe was in the NICU for an additional 3 days because she was so jaundiced. Three weeks after she was born we spent a week at Children's Mercy Hospital due to the fact that her ureters (tubes from the kidneys to the bladder) were underdeveloped. She spiked a 105 degree fever from a bladder/kidney infection, and had to have an IV through the top of her HEAD because they couldn't find a vein in her arm. Oh yeah, they also gave her a SPINAL TAP to make sure she didn't have meningitis...they made me leave the room for that procedure, and me in all of my postpartum glory had a full-on mega meltdown. Granted, she's almost 4 now and no worse for the wear - her kidneys developed without a transplant or surgery of any kind, which they were concerned about at first - but let's just say my first birth/newborn experience was not magical, it quite frankly, sucked ass. Ryan and I also discovered, we are not awesome people with zero sleep. We hated each other, and borderline hated our child (well, not really...but it was ROUGH). So despite it being almost 4 years later....this is all still very fresh in my mind. Wow. Do I really WANT to do all that drama again? and do it all again with a preschooler and a full time job in tow as well? (I wasn't working when I had Jillian) Let's think about this for a minute...
And when I say "think about it for a minute" I mean I AGONIZED for months. I made literal Pros and Cons lists. I talked anyones ear off who would sit and listen to me cry about all of my fears and reservations. I'm pretty sure people dodged spending time with me because it would just turn into another of "Erin's Existential Meltdowns".
So finally, FINALLY I felt good enough to say outloud "YES, I WANT ANOTHER BABY!" Yesssss! That wasn't so hard! LET'S DO THIS!
Now, with Jillian, I had been on the pill for eons. I was off of it for a grand total of 6 weeks and got pregnant on the first try. I assumed it would be even easier the second time around. Then, May turned to June, July, August, September......waaaaaaiiiiit a minute?! Why am I not pregnant?! I peed on the ovulation predictor sticks for months and well, isn't that interesting? I'M NOT EVEN OVULATING! WTF? I went to my gynocologist and she offered to give me Clomid - which is basically a fertility drug that forces you to ovulate. Downside is that you have a greater risk for multiples, and it makes you a little hormonally crazy while you're taking it. So much so, she requires your husband to come in before you start it for a "counseling session" regarding side effects. NO THANK YOU! There is enough crazy in our house as it is, so I declined the offer. she sent me to a chiropractor who has had success with other infertility patients (More on my beloved Dr. Michelle later...) This is why I absolutely love my gynocologist - she's into holistic and natural healing as well as chemical remedies.
This my friends started my quest on finding a path to WELLNESS.
THIS IS BIG TIME STUFF!
to be continued...
Friday, June 24, 2011
"Yeah yeah, you feel like crap...but nothing's wrong with you, here's an antidepressant..."
Oh doctors...you are so wise, so all-knowing. I should never question you, and I should put 100% faith into your textbook medical degree, because we all know you're smarter than me (obviously, because you paid $100K for a degree and "applied" yourself for 3 times as many years in school than I chose to), and of course, you know my body better than I do. I vow to stay off the internet and to quit diagnosing myself through WebMD (even though its written from the same textbooks you used...). I should not challenge you or ask questions when I disagree with you, because "I just don't want to hear the truth....". I will go ahead and pop your antidepressant, because really all of my symptoms point to depression, especially since my lab work continuously comes back "normal", therefore depression is the ONLY answer. Never mind the C-Reactive Protein levels being through the roof, never mind TPO levels being high either, and never mind my sonogram shows my thyroid is enlarged and inflamed, but not "really anything to be concerned about at this point". Depression it is. Thanks, I will leave now with my prescription and follow up in a year.
In the meantime, I will flounder at work and be forced to take a demotion and pay cut because I can't concentrate, can't remember details, and can't get through the day without a nap. I will alienate my husband, child, friends, and family because even simple tasks such as vacuuming, balancing the checkbook, playing with my child, or going to dinner create such bone numbing fatigue that I'm in bed by 7:30 every evening. I will get lost on a street that I've driven everyday for the past 10 years, because suddenly I have such a brain fog that it feels like I'm either drunk, or I'm looking through a window with Crisco smeared on it. I'll stop exercising, and start wearing a wrist and elbow brace because I have extreme bone and joint pain that makes my hands swell to the point where I sometimes can't even hold a pen to write with. I hurt, I'm tired, and I'm cranky. I'm not dying...no...but I'm not really living either.
And nothings wrong with me, eh? I have been to 6 specialists in two years, and they all concur, nothing is wrong. Ooooooooook. Maybe I AM crazy!
But no...In the back of my mind I was 100% convinced that it was my thyroid that was causing all my problems. It was just a matter of convincing a doctor as well. Then I found this website (and a few others like it)...turns out, I'm not alone! HALLELUJAH!!! I'm going to reference this website a lot, because they speak more eloquently on the subject matter than I do - I was now an official member of the "Undiagnosed Club" http://www.stopthethyroidmadness.com/
Dues: increasing symptoms of hypothyroidism paid in full
Length of membership: a few years leading into decades for some
Mottos: “Your TSH is normal. It’s not your thyroid.” “You need to eat less, exercise more.” “Everyone needs to nap” “You need to see a therapist.” “Your problems are due to being a mom/stress/genetics/your job.” “Here’s a script for your anti-depressant/statin/blood pressure med/psychotropic.” “Your hair loss is due to being a mom/stress/genetics.” “It’s just Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/fibromyalgia” “I don’t know what’s wrong with you.”
Sound at all familiar?
Enlightened thyroid patients all over the world report going years while coping with the pesky flies of hypothyroid symptoms, sans a diagnosis. And it’s all because of the inane and lousy TSH lab test (below left) with its dubious “normal” range, or the doctor’s failure to notice clinical presentation of the cluster of hypothyroid symptoms rather than simply an ink spot on a piece of paper which can mean squat.
As years go by without a diagnosis, the adrenals can take the hit trying to keep you afloat, resulting in high or low cortisol symptoms including anxiety, fear, difficulty coping, sleep problems, not waking up refreshed and other symptoms of an adrenal beating.
...BONUS - I was left untreated for so long that my adrenals are now burned out as well!
I made friends with people in the chat rooms who are going through the same hell. I always thought it was weird to befriend a complete stranger, but these people became someone to confide in who has been there, because at this point everyone else in my life is getting annoyed with my complaints. (Like I said in the last post "What the Hell is wrong with you?!") New chat buddies who "get" it are comforting? Yes.... but comfort doesn't always replace a good doctor...
I tried acupuncture. I liked it, if for anything I got a prescribed a 30 minute relaxation nap in a dark room with nice music once a week. However, after a few months of weekly sessions, I still wasn't feeling better, and at $35 a session, there had to be a point where I moved along.
I also tried massage for the joint pain - again - felt great while I was there, but no real lasting effects.
As mentioned earlier, I went to 6 doctors - Endocrinologist (x2), Rheumatologist, 2 GP's and my Gynecologist. Of all people, my gyno was the most supportive....go figure! .
After months of running around to doctors I sort of gave up. Guess getting older sucks. I'm 30 now...this is the way its going to be. I'll just make sure I get lots of sleep, and start eating better. Ryan and I decided we were going to try for another baby - after all, I was "healthy", and it shouldn't be a problem.....right? So I got off the pill...
To be continued...
In the meantime, I will flounder at work and be forced to take a demotion and pay cut because I can't concentrate, can't remember details, and can't get through the day without a nap. I will alienate my husband, child, friends, and family because even simple tasks such as vacuuming, balancing the checkbook, playing with my child, or going to dinner create such bone numbing fatigue that I'm in bed by 7:30 every evening. I will get lost on a street that I've driven everyday for the past 10 years, because suddenly I have such a brain fog that it feels like I'm either drunk, or I'm looking through a window with Crisco smeared on it. I'll stop exercising, and start wearing a wrist and elbow brace because I have extreme bone and joint pain that makes my hands swell to the point where I sometimes can't even hold a pen to write with. I hurt, I'm tired, and I'm cranky. I'm not dying...no...but I'm not really living either.
And nothings wrong with me, eh? I have been to 6 specialists in two years, and they all concur, nothing is wrong. Ooooooooook. Maybe I AM crazy!
But no...In the back of my mind I was 100% convinced that it was my thyroid that was causing all my problems. It was just a matter of convincing a doctor as well. Then I found this website (and a few others like it)...turns out, I'm not alone! HALLELUJAH!!! I'm going to reference this website a lot, because they speak more eloquently on the subject matter than I do - I was now an official member of the "Undiagnosed Club" http://www.stopthethyroidmadness.com/
The Undiagnosed Club
Membership quota: a global mass of medically-duped individualsDues: increasing symptoms of hypothyroidism paid in full
Length of membership: a few years leading into decades for some
Mottos: “Your TSH is normal. It’s not your thyroid.” “You need to eat less, exercise more.” “Everyone needs to nap” “You need to see a therapist.” “Your problems are due to being a mom/stress/genetics/your job.” “Here’s a script for your anti-depressant/statin/blood pressure med/psychotropic.” “Your hair loss is due to being a mom/stress/genetics.” “It’s just Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/fibromyalgia” “I don’t know what’s wrong with you.”
Sound at all familiar?
Enlightened thyroid patients all over the world report going years while coping with the pesky flies of hypothyroid symptoms, sans a diagnosis. And it’s all because of the inane and lousy TSH lab test (below left) with its dubious “normal” range, or the doctor’s failure to notice clinical presentation of the cluster of hypothyroid symptoms rather than simply an ink spot on a piece of paper which can mean squat.
As years go by without a diagnosis, the adrenals can take the hit trying to keep you afloat, resulting in high or low cortisol symptoms including anxiety, fear, difficulty coping, sleep problems, not waking up refreshed and other symptoms of an adrenal beating.
...BONUS - I was left untreated for so long that my adrenals are now burned out as well!
I made friends with people in the chat rooms who are going through the same hell. I always thought it was weird to befriend a complete stranger, but these people became someone to confide in who has been there, because at this point everyone else in my life is getting annoyed with my complaints. (Like I said in the last post "What the Hell is wrong with you?!") New chat buddies who "get" it are comforting? Yes.... but comfort doesn't always replace a good doctor...
I tried acupuncture. I liked it, if for anything I got a prescribed a 30 minute relaxation nap in a dark room with nice music once a week. However, after a few months of weekly sessions, I still wasn't feeling better, and at $35 a session, there had to be a point where I moved along.
I also tried massage for the joint pain - again - felt great while I was there, but no real lasting effects.
As mentioned earlier, I went to 6 doctors - Endocrinologist (x2), Rheumatologist, 2 GP's and my Gynecologist. Of all people, my gyno was the most supportive....go figure! .
After months of running around to doctors I sort of gave up. Guess getting older sucks. I'm 30 now...this is the way its going to be. I'll just make sure I get lots of sleep, and start eating better. Ryan and I decided we were going to try for another baby - after all, I was "healthy", and it shouldn't be a problem.....right? So I got off the pill...
To be continued...
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
I got 99 symptoms...
Many have asked me: "what the hell is wrong with you?"...
well not really, generally people have been really nice and concerned, and I appreciate that. I've had a pretty interesting 2 years, healthwise. I'll tell the whole story on here, but it will be a process, as my path to wellness has been a process too. I've learned a lot, and I'd like to promote all the good things I've learned in my quest, because I think the information I've gathered from various sources is relevant to EVERYONE, not just people with an Auto-Immune disease.
For now, I'll start with the beginning...July 2009, I start feeling like shit...
The Long and Pathetic List of Hashimoto's Auto-Immune Thyroiditis Symptoms
(The hi-lited ones are mine, specifically)
(from the website: http://www.stopthethyroidmadness.com/long-and-pathetic/)
Less stamina than others
Less energy than others
Long recovery period after any activity
Inability to hold children for very long
Arms feeling like dead weights after activity
Chronic Low Grade Depression
Suicidal Thoughts
Often feeling cold
Cold hands and feet
High or rising cholesterol
Heart disease
Palpitations
Fibrillations
Plaque buildup
Bizarre and Debilitating reaction to exercise
Hard stools
Constipation
No eyebrows or thinning outer eyebrows
Dry Hair
Hair Loss
White hairs growing in
No hair growth, breaks faster than it grows
Dry cracking skin
Nodding off easily
Requires naps in the afternoon
Sleep Apnea (which can also be associated with low cortisol)
Air Hunger (feeling like you can’t get enough air)
Inability to concentrate or read long periods of time
Forgetfulness
Foggy thinking
Inability to lose weight
Always gaining weight
Inability to function in a relationship with anyone
NO sex drive
Failure to ovulate and/or constant bleeding (see Rainbow’s story)
Moody periods
PMS
Inability to get pregnant; miscarriages
Excruciating pain during period
Nausea
Swelling/edema/puffiness
Aching bones/muscles
Osteoporosis
Bumps on legs
Acne on face and in hair
Breakout on chest and arms
Hives
Exhaustion in every dimension–physical, mental, spiritual, emotional
Inability to work full-time
Inability to stand on feet for long periods
Complete lack of motivation
Slowing to a snail’s pace when walking up slight grade
Extremely crabby, irritable, intolerant of others
Handwriting nearly illegible
Internal itching of ears
Broken/peeling fingernails
Dry skin or snake skin
Major anxiety/worry
Ringing in ears
Lactose Intolerance
Inability to eat in the mornings
Joint pain
Carpal tunnel symptoms
No Appetite
Fluid retention to the point of Congestive Heart Failure
Swollen legs that prevented walking
Blood Pressure problems
Varicose Veins
Dizziness from fluid on the inner ear
Low body temperature
Raised temperature
Tightness in throat; sore throat
Swollen lymph glands
Allergies (which can also be a result of low cortisol–common with hypothyroid patients)
Headaches and Migraines
Sore feet (plantar fascitis); painful soles of feet
now how do I put this one politely….a cold bum, butt, derriere, fanny, gluteus maximus, haunches, hindquarters, posterior, rear, and/or cheeks. Yup, really exists.
colitis
irritable bowel syndrome
painful bladder
Extreme hunger, especially at nighttime
Dysphagia, which is nerve damage and causes the inability to swallow fluid, food or your own saliva and leads to “aspiration pneumonia”.
...to be continued...
well not really, generally people have been really nice and concerned, and I appreciate that. I've had a pretty interesting 2 years, healthwise. I'll tell the whole story on here, but it will be a process, as my path to wellness has been a process too. I've learned a lot, and I'd like to promote all the good things I've learned in my quest, because I think the information I've gathered from various sources is relevant to EVERYONE, not just people with an Auto-Immune disease.
For now, I'll start with the beginning...July 2009, I start feeling like shit...
The Long and Pathetic List of Hashimoto's Auto-Immune Thyroiditis Symptoms
(The hi-lited ones are mine, specifically)
(from the website: http://www.stopthethyroidmadness.com/long-and-pathetic/)
...to be continued...
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